The reason I have chosen to create an online record of my thoughts and experiences is to encourage and enlighten anyone who seeks Truth. I have spent most of my life in a struggle to overcome addiction and morbid despair. In that struggle I searched for wisdom far and wide, and everywhere I listened I heard the ecclesiastical voice say "All is vanity".
I made an inquiry into the source of all things, I sought empirical evidence for all of my beliefs. I sought to find the solid and universal justification for any system of thought that crossed my path. All of them crumbled before me. I began to inquire into the foundation of knowledge and understanding, these too dissipated before my withering scrutiny. All was subject to a reasonable doubt. I finally doubted the very existence of my creator, and fancied the notion that there could be a blind-mad god of chaos that slouched at the center of the universe just like Lovecraft imagined.
When I finally learned to believe in nothing impermanent, I discovered that there was nothing left but my consciousness, and a door I had never opened.
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