When Haunted I'm Home

 Our hand is held by love without body

 we laugh together with only my voice

this ghost will remain til the end of the age

when haunted I'm home, a hearth cleared of ash

Synchronicity leaves a lasting impression

no other mark makes such a distinction

a plot woven tightly around our perception

this story to turn is truly completion

a fragment

Beautiful clear eyes

azure bands blended with emerald

flecks of gold and storm clouds

perceiving unto the event horizon

wonders and terrors

above and below

as summer begins to fall

I feel the stir of my broken body

drawing the shadow long with running

 I was once pursued by it

now I make chase, going where I'm led

looking back up you smile from the moon

showing a path through the murky moor

The Source Family

   I just viewed a documentary about the Source Family. They were a spiritual commune in the late 60's - 1975. Kids discovering mysticism for the first time, swept up in the spirit of new-age optimism. They were also a cult.
   Jim Baker, their leader, was a charismatic man; cut from the archetypal cloth of all cult leaders. He was like Santa Claus and Donald Sutherland smushed into a white robe. He was the father figure that his "children" wanted, the dad they never had.
   The evolution of their mystic practices were directly tied to Jim Baker's own self-concept. Early on He had a recognition of his own limited understanding. His humility and rigorous self discipline allowed him to lead a growing following in his footsteps. Gradually his ego began to inflate.               Supported by the adoration of his followers and occult influences, He began to refer to himself as God. He then changed his name to 'Yod' and later 'Yahowha'.
   The turning point for the group seems to be when he changed his policy on monogamy, which heretofore had been observed. Much like Mohammad, He instituted polygamy, and became the chief polygamist of the group with 13 wives. This divided the group and many left. Jim Baker continued his pursuit of mystical knowledge and power, their rituals and ceremonies becoming stranger and darker. They began to practice sexual magic, particularly influenced by the Order of the Golden Dawn.
    Eventually they group moved to Hawaii, it was there that Jim's ego deflated rapidly. The morning of his death, he gathered his followers and took a walk. He told them he was not God, he was only a man. Jim took a hang glider out in a high wind with no training, crashed, and died 9 hours later.
   What struck me most profoundly about this story is that one cannot entirely dismiss the group because of the moral failure of its leader. They were trying to fulfill a very real longing for a spiritual father, Jim Baker tried to be that father. He wasn't merely playing God, he was sincerely trying to take on that role, and his failure came from being unable to bear such a burden. We all have a longing for a spiritual father and mother, it outlives our relationship with our natural-born parents.
   The motivation of this mystical group was not an unnatural one, and it hits close to home. The mistake they made was in confusing their heavenly father with an earthly one. The man died, but our heavenly father remains, alive and available.